Tag Archives: Society

December 16, 2009 · 3:00 AM

Mas! Mas!

If I were a cheerleader, I’d cheer for Christmas.

Christmas has always been huge in my family — tons of decorations, celebrations, feasts, presents and Christmas Eve church services. This year is the first Christmas I will spend apart from my family, and we’re a little sad about it. We know it will be hard to be apart, but we’ll see each other several times before that day.

I’m using this time to examine my thoughts about Christmas, since Mike’s family’s traditions are very different from mine. I’ve learned a lot about the history of Christmas through them and it’s given me much to consider. I’ve learned that Christmas shouldn’t have anything to do with Jesus or his birth, based on the fact that in the Bible neither Jesus nor anyone else says that we should remember His birthday (conversely, we are told to remember his death and resurrection) and in fact, we don’t even know His real birth date.

We can love and honor Christ apart from anything to do with popular holidays. Rather than try to focus Christmas on Christ, they’ve explained, we should accept that the two have nothing in common and just celebrate it for what it is — good cheer, festivity, presents, family. In essence, let’s take the Christ out of Christmas and let’s just have…mas. In Spanish, that would be MORE.

And I’m always all for more.

In fact, I think I’m well on my way to more. This December has already been decorated with several events that are indeed mas but have absolutely nothing to do with Christ. Years ago (even last year) I would have felt a twinge of guilt for celebrating without focusing completely on Jesus, but now? Bring on the mindless merriment!

Christmas Tree: To start our season, we got a tree. Yes, it’s alive, and yes, it’s the same height as me: five feet five inches. We love our tree because it makes our home cozy and cheerful, it holds meaningful symbols (baby ornaments, second grade pictures of Mike, gifts from friends), and it delays us having to buy a new chair to fill the space it occupies. (If you look closely, you can see a cross ornament…so I guess I haven’t figured this out quite yet.)

After all, Christmas trees were virtually forbidden by our colonial leaders in 1659, when a law was enacted that made any “heathen traditions” such as Christmas carols, decorations and trees a penal offense involving a fine. We Rephs enjoy setting up our tree without paying a fine.

White Christmas: The same night that we got our tree, we attended “Irving Berlin’s White Christmas” musical at Seattle’s 5th Avenue Theater. Two other couples invited us to dress up and go out on the town, and we thought nothing could be more Christmasy than the stage version of the Bing Crosby movie (which I had only seen once and Mike had never seen). It was uncomplicated, plump, shiny and almost too cheesy to bear — and that was entirely the point. “May your days be merry and bright” indeed!

Tacky Themed Dress-Up Party: Every year we are invited to a number of parties that require an ugly sweater, santa hat, or this year, 80’s ski gear. The only thing 80’s ski gear and Christmas have in common is snow, I suppose, but we went with it. The results speak for themselves.

Cirque de la Symphonie: Certainly the highlight of the Christmas season so far was attending the mind-boggling circus acts performed in front of a full orchestra playing classic Christmas favorites. Mike took me and my sisters to Benaroya Hall and we all gasped our way through this stellar performance. Previous to this evening none of us had seen a man in a handstand on another man’s HEAD with only ONE HAND.

The champagne at intermission didn’t hurt, either.

White Elephant Gift Exchange Parties: Two of these are on the calendar this year, one of which happened at my workplace — I arrived with a bathrobe and departed with two bags of candy. Lame. And what could be less Christ and more mas than giving gifts that are utterly random? Myrrh and gold are not random; those gifts were intentional, I assure you.

I totally respect those who see Christmas as a holy holiday, because I do too, to some degree. After 25 years it’s virtually an innate response. But I love examining why we do what we do, and seeing if we can do it differently and still be honorable.

After all, when it comes to Christmas carols, for every “…the glories of His righteousness, and wonders of His love, and wonders of His love,” there are just as many “…oh bring us a figgy pudding, oh bring us a figgy pudding, and a cup of good cheer.”

As for me? This Christmas I’ll ponder the wonders of His love — while sipping a cup of good cheer.

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Filed under UpWORD (Beauty)

Tagged as Christmas, Mike Reph, music, Seattle, Society, symphony

October 21, 2009 · 6:00 AM

Stars! They’re Just Like US!

The most startling aspect of the Richard Heene “balloon boy” debacle isn’t that he used his children as pawns, or that he wasted taxpayer dollars so that hundreds of people could look for his not-missing child, or even that he lied.

The most remarkable part of the story is that he did all of this for…a reality TV show.

Way to set that bar high, buddy.

As the story of the hoax broke, people were outraged, and rightfully so, but they should not have been shocked. Heene is not the first person to shamelessly put his family up for auction to the highest bidder in the name of fame. If “Octo-Mom” can have networks knocking on her door to give her $50,000 an episode, who can blame mad-scientist Richard Heene for wanting some green?

People used to only have a shot at fame if they were enormously talented and landed that one-in-a-million chance of connecting with the right people, living in the right city, and succeeding on their thousandth audition. Now, everyone is under the impression that if they put themselves out there, are weird enough, and are OK with being filmed in their home, they will gain national recognition.

Decent behavior and dignity have taken understudy roles, unfortunately.

Example: “The Real Housewives” series. There is not one ounce of regret or embarrassment for being portrayed as vain, selfish, catty women. They are proud of it. But at least the networks know this and play it up to embarrass them. It’s like the viewers and the producers are in on the same joke at the absurdity of their behavior. (Full disclosure: I think these women are pathetic…yet I am obsessed with the New York branch.)

But I don’t think this type of behavior is exclusive to those who believe in extra-terrestrials or those who are just extra-fertile. I think all of us have that same desire for fame, to some degree.

It’s as if most of us crave worship. We want others to look at our lives, approve, and envy. We want people to admire us and want to be like us.

If anyone thinks they are above this banal behavior, they should check their Facebook profile. It’s like our very own non-celebrity People.com or US Weekly. We post ultra-flattering photos and compose status updates that practically scream, “Look at my fabulous life!” It’s akin to having a personal PR campaign. I am utterly guilty of this, and when I think about it, I feel a self-repulsive shiver.

Few people ever post honest struggles or content that would put them in an unfavorable light. I agree with this to a point; after all, not everyone should enter our dark places, and perhaps Facebook is light-hearted enough that we should keep it positive.

But the point stands: we seek to be adored.

Cough, cough…this blog…cough, cough.

I mean, honestly. I am not going to avoid admitting I enjoy that people read Words Become One. If I were to balk at myself right now, you wouldn’t even buy it.

Besides, blogs are naturally muddy waters because it is not possible for any blogger, however humble, to pretend that their site does not begin and end with him or her. She is writing from her frame of reference, about her thoughts, in her own life. Whether it’s a news analysis blog or a mommy blog — it is unavoidably about the writer.

So what to do about it? How does anyone conquer this need to gather the masses in praise of oneself? What will convince Richard Heene that he should get a job like any other father, rather than seek fame to his family’s detriment?

Practicing the art of humility would seem most obvious, but it is also quite difficult because as soon as we’ve done it we have the tendency to destroy it by thinking, “Hurray! I’m being humble!” If you can avoid that catch-22, please tell me how. It’s very annoying.

Worshiping God is one weapon in this inner battle. Through giving honor to Him rather than to myself or others, I realize that He is infinitely deserving of my admiration. My own flaws and faults, by comparison, make me slightly ill. And I want to be idolized? Barf.

For now, I will do one small part by ricocheting this me-me-me blog into new territory. I am handing Words Become One over to a guest blogger next week. I will not reveal who this blogger is until next Wednesday, but trust me, you won’t be disappointed.

Neither will I. After all, I chose the writer. (Because remember, it’s all about me.)

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Filed under One WORD (Current Events)

Tagged as balloon boy, celebrities, Richard Heene, Society

October 7, 2009 · 6:00 AM

You’re Either In, Or You’re OUT

We all have an opinion about it, however subconscious, because each of us has to face it. Every. Single. Day.

What to wear.

I can hear the collective sigh among male readers: a girl post. How fast can I get to the red X in the corner of the screen?

Hear me out. Despite both of our preconceived notions, this affects men, too.

Take my father, for instance. He will tell you in no uncertain terms that clothes don’t matter and are not worth thinking about whatsoever. It would seem logical, then, that you could dress him in anything and he would have no opinion.

But try taking him to buy a pair of shoes. We went to Nordstrom after my insistence that he not embark on another family vacation with geeky, toe-revealing black sandals. I thought he would mindlessly accept the first pair I picked out.

No. He rejected pair after pair after pair of fabulous shoes. One had too many straps. One didn’t have enough straps. One was the wrong brown. One looked too feminine.

The point is, by the time we walked out with a pair of sandals, it was clear that even those who care the least about fashion in theory, actually care very much about fashion in practice.

Why? Because everyone sees your choices.

In few other areas of your life does a choice stand so prominently in front of every person you encounter, friend or stranger. In a matter of seconds people look you up and down and can tell twenty things about you. That, I believe, is why fashion is so paralyzing.

I am one such person learning to walk after paralysis. My form of disability is what I like to call Safety Fashion. My choices are solid and classic — that also makes them incredibly boring. If you had to pluck me out of one catalog, it would be J.Crew. Take everything that is J.Crew out of my closet and soon you will have an empress with very few clothes.

I love solids, I love fabrics that flatter, I love pieces that can move from season to season. I have shoes for every occasion, but none that scream that they are impractical.

And I am entirely over this.

I am over worrying about whether I can pull it off. I am done trying to conform to what others expect.

My sister Erin is my idol in this regard. She reigns supreme, with confidence to spare, in outfits so daring she gets remarks everywhere she goes.

However, this is also the sister I blame for my fashion fear. She practically pushed me right into the closet of Safety Fashion. In high school, it would not be unusual for me to be completely ready, about to head out the door, only for her to look me up and down and slowly remark, “Is that what you’re wearing?”

I dare you to find five words that can strip a person’s confidence faster. Not that I blame her. I probably was less-than-ready for the catwalk.

Every other time I have wanted to bust out of my closet of fashion fear, it’s as if the door swings both ways and hits me in the face. It’s guilt. Why invest in clothes and accessories when I should be working on making myself a better person? Why give thought to color when there are people in the world with no clothing?

Ugh. You would think I was Amish.

So I called this fashion-forward sibling to get her take. She happens to be extremely devout in her faith in Jesus and Marc Jacobs, so she had to have faced this problem before.

“I honestly believe that how you dress matters. It matters in how other people perceive you. It matters in how you perceive yourself. I know personally when I make an effort to look presentable, I feel better about my day, about myself, I have more confidence,” Erin explained. “I do think fashion is important. It’s taken to extremes in people who idolize fashion, but that doesn’t mean that it’s a sinful thing. It’s a heart issue. I enjoy fashion, but I enjoy it in the place that it is.”

Good enough for me.

But there is one other pesky issue: based on my previous post, my biggest obstacle to any shopping endeavor is money. I loathe shopping and spending money on clothes. I have always failed to pull out the credit card because why invest in something that is not going to be stylish in six months?

Then I remember that this is exactly why H&M was invented, and I relax a little.

Maybe it’s too many episodes of Rachel Zoe, but I am envisioning walking down the street in this:

rachel_zoe_in_fur_vest